This post is to remind me that today is a beautiful day. I am grateful to have it laid before me. Why should I waste these precious moments of life worrying about the distant or even not so distant future? I am here now. I want to enjoy it.
I got to stay home and sleep in on a cold, snowy Friday. What a perfect start to the day. My silly little pup got out of her collar and had a run around the neighbors yard this morning, which gave me a laugh. It also always warms my heart when she so loyally returns to me upon my call. I also decided to finally try some chocolate flavored coffee grounds I got myself for Christmas. They make a delicious cup of coffee as expected.
All of these small joys are usually forgotten as soon as they happen. Over the years I have trained my mind to overlook such simple moments of bliss. It makes sense. The brain is focused on keeping us alive. It is hard-wired to hone in on threats and danger so that we may avoid it and live to see another day. It is up to me to work on that wiring. I must teach my brain that we are safe. We don’t have to waste our energy on fear-filled vigilance. We can focus on the good in this life instead.
Even a lot of the things that I become anxious about, don’t have to be negative experiences. I can choose to focus on overcoming the fear rather than the fear itself. For example, I have to make some phone calls for work today, which always gives me a lot of anxiety. But rather than concentrate on how afraid I am, I can focus on how wonderful it is going to feel once I’ve accomplished this quick, simple task. How proud I will feel. How relieved. How glad I will be that I did my job well for an organization that I dearly love.
Even as I write these words, I realize that directing the mind toward positive things is much easier said that done. A small voice in the back of my head always scoffs at these hippy-dippy positivity posts. But I have let that part of my mind have full reign for long enough. I am ready to wrestle with it from now on if that is what it takes to steal away some small moments of happiness. I won’t give up. This is my life. And even if it isn’t always easy, I am going to keep fighting for the freedom to enjoy it. I will keep nursing these pools of love and gratitude within my heart until they are as vast as oceans. I will let their rhythmic tide carry me.