Blackout

I've lost another holiday
to heavy drinking
a blank void where
memories should be
left to fill up with regret

Waking up to one eyelash
a bruised, aching foot
dozens of unanswered texts
and a body that feels
like it's full of static

Fighting the urge to vomit
as I sip an unsatisfying coffee
wondering how badly
I embarrassed myself
in front of my family

It must have been bad
because my mom insisted
on following me home
tried to convince me
not to drive a few blocks

I feel slimy with shame
as it seeps from my pores
the hopeless desperation
to undo what cannot
be undone

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