My soul is an impressionist painter finding beauty at a blurry distance so much potential and excitement still waiting to be discovered Feeling sick inside as I slide forward to notice the soft edges have become hard and defined repelled by the rough realness of reality that contains concrete corners and lines My eyes frantically search for another frothy formless future far away where everything can be perfect suspended in ideals and imagination The grass is always greener because you can't see it well enough yet to notice all the biting beetles hidden beneath and between the bright blades Dreams manifested can never hold a candle to those yet to be reached and realized the mind is the only place things can be perfect a pleasant pile of pros with no cons Fixed a few feet away from fantasy the tantalizing glow behind a half-opened door my essence is the same as a dissatisfied cat unable to commit to open or closed Savoring the sweetness of desire before the bitterness of defeat or the horror of an unanticipated too sharply real success
My sweet baby and I are living together in the wilderness. We have a completely self-sustaining lifestyle. We do the things that used to be a normal part of being human. We spend most of the day gathering fresh water, medicinal herbs, wildflowers, roots, nuts, berries and whatever else we may need from the abundant natural world all around us. Each day is an adventure. We feel the soil beneath our feet. We get our hands dirty, feeling our way through the lush green textures of the mountainside. Sun soaked skin, hearts filled with the joy of living.
A vegan world where humans and other animals live side by side in peaceful harmony. We greet our neighbors (the local deer, chipmunks, squirrels, etc.) scratch their heads, give them small tastes of what we’ve gathered this morning. We call them by name and sing to them as they follow behind us toward home. Both the animals and the plants are family that we know well. We take care of one another with gratitude.
Before heading inside with our haul, we check on our garden where we grow what we aren’t able to find. Soft caresses of leaves as we work our way through the freshly dampened soil, inspecting, checking to see what’s ripe. After we’ve completed our “work.” We lie side by side in the cool grass, under the shade of a tree we grew ourselves, another one of our children. We take turns reading aloud to one another from a book, pausing here and there to discuss our thoughts on different passages or to steal a quick kiss.
Every evening we gather with the small, close-knit community that we have cultivated. We start to gather wood for a fire and prepare some food to share. It’s such a meaningful experience to come together with like-minded people. We each have our own unique energy to offer. We make art, play music, dance, watch the human children run and play with the fur children. Once a month our gathering is extra spiritual. We all eat some of the foraged mushrooms we’ve dried and stored away, embarking on regular, epic voyages of the mind together.
We are no longer burdened by the pressures, expectations, and limitations of traditional society. No one has a job besides taking care of themselves and their loved ones. We all pitch in to help those in need, bonding over shared experiences and mutual vulnerability. The children in our community are loved, protected, and cared for by all of us. They come and go as they please from every house. They are well educated both intellectually and spiritually.
Physical touch between friends is no longer taboo, whether male or female. We all express our affection freely, without fear of sexual misunderstandings. We have clear and open communication between everyone in the community. We live without shame or fear of ridicule, knowing we are all accepted for exactly who we are.
Each night we go to bed mentally and physically exhausted, but in a good way. We sleep deep, with the stars above us shining through the glass ceilinged bedroom which lets us rise and fall with the sun. Our hearts are full of hope, love, and excitement for the day to come.